Packing Day!

Am I truly mad? Can I do this?
50 years old this year, no, that was last year (you see, the memory is already going).

How do I put in to words the last 14 months?? Dad passed away on the 4th January 2009. I am an orphan.

I arrived back in South Africa at the beginning of February. I looked at my partner/husband of 17 years and knew I had to change everything, yes, everything.

How do I tell him? Not new news of course as I'd tried to leave at least 4 times before, but came back every time the going got tough. I don't want to dwell on that though as I am onward and upward and he is in the past.

On the 4th May (yes, it took a while) I managed to tell him. I finally left on the 13th July 2009. What takes me so long to do everything I wonder???

So, leaving my 3 miniature daschunds behind I moved in to the an apartment overlooking the sea. My apartment was on the 13th floor and I have a problem with heights.

The pain began, the doubts, the fear of being alone, the fear of not being alone, trapped and unhappy.

I decided to celebrate my 50th birthday with my special girlfriends. You know who you are. My Boo Hoo Crew! They are perfect! They made my week in Portugal perfect too!

When I returned, I realised i needed to do something different, something out of the ordinary. I needed to shed the past and find out who the heck I am.

This is where this blog begins.... My ADVENTURE.

I have packed up (or rather am busy doing so).... Saying goodbye to sun,sand and golf! Saying goodbye to my beautiful daughter and my special friend and starting a 4 month trip to who knows where.

The point? The point is to be ME.... (whatever that may be). Free from having to be what someone else needs me to be. To meet new people, to make new friends and to shed the rolled up carpet that I have dragged around for 50 years.

So, I am inviting you to come on this journey with me. I'm not a great writer (obviously), but I will share from my heart....

Today is Saturday 20th March. I am due to leave on Tuesday if British Airways strikers allow me to and I head for London where my daughter lives with her lovely new white sofa and her equally lovely man.

As fate would have it, my best friend arrives in Cape Town the day I hope to leave. She is packing up her elderly parents in-law for a life in the UK. This is what happens in our fifities isn't it.

I'm truly hoping there is more to life and I intend to give it my all and find out.....

S